Most people, when they have a disease will try to find a cure or treatment for that disease.  Alcohol addiction and chemical dependency are unlike any other known disease. People, who have it, generally do not seek treatment without some form of intervention.  This can be intervention by family, friends, work, court ordered rehabilitation, civil or criminal charges, even a complete mental or physical breakdown, to name a few.  Addicted people do not seek treatment because they do not know they have a disease, or they are in total denial.  This denial effectively blocks the conscious ability to make the right decisions.

The chemically dependent person remains unaware of the progress of the disease.  As behavior becomes more bizarre, rationalization and denial take an emotional toll.  Rationalization and denial are no longer trotted out on occasion; they become part of the fabric of everyday life.  They are invisible, they become insidious, and they are a disastrous response to the pain of addiction.  The more an individual believes his own rationalization, the further into delusion and denial he goes. The only thing that can save this slide into oblivion is intervention.

Intervention is the most effective technique that can be used to help one suffering from alcohol addiction dependency. It is also the most ignored. Intervention is the first line of defense in bringing an alcoholic to sobriety. It is the single most powerful step that can overcome denial and initiate an alcoholic’s recovery process.

Many of your questions about intervention are answered in the Frequently Asked Questions section of the home page. The following is our guideline to help you help your loved one, friend or employee.

Step One.  Building a Team.  Building a team gives you the best possible chance of defeating addiction. Your success depends on the help of a well-selected group of five to eight people working together.  Selecting the team for intervention starts with making a list of all of the significant people in the alcoholic’s life.  The names of relatives, friends, co-workers, employers, clergy, teachers and family should be top of the list.  Not all will participate, but build the list anyway.

Step Two.  Make sure the intervention is kept secret and remove anyone from the list who may tell the alcoholic about the upcoming meeting.  Some people might think they are doing the alcoholic a favor but they will not be. A “heads up” will give the Alcoholic time to build stronger defenses against help.  If the alcoholic learns about the intervention, the intervention will fail.

Step Three.  Plan a rehearsal and if a team member can’t attend, then remove him from the list.  Whatever the circumstance, rehearsal attendance is not optional.

Step Four.  Arrange a treatment center that will take the alcoholic away from his environment of booze and addiction for at least 28 days.  We believe The Manor House is the best choice. If you stumble across someone who claims they have found the “cure” or a “new way” to treat addiction that no one else has thought of before, be wary.  Choose a program such as ours at The Manor House, which treats addiction as a primary disease and use the Twelve Steps of Alcoholic Anonymous as these programs have proven time and time again to be effective in about 80 to 85 percent of the cases.  Remember that relapse is a real and constant danger. Without a strong AA group and a community support system after treatment, the chances of failure are great. The Manor House can arrange a sponsor and schedule 90 AA meetings in ninety days after release from the program.  Without this, you will not have much chance of success.

Step Five.  Choose a Chairperson to conduct the intervention. During an intervention, no one may ad lib.  Everyone writes a letter about two pages long to read to the alcoholic.  It must start with love and care, outlining how much the Alcoholic means to the person in their life and no one says anything other than what they have written, except the chairperson.  The chairperson is the spokesman for the group.  The team must NEVER get into a debate with the alcoholic. To do so would take the power away from the group and bestow it upon the alcoholic. Team members read their letters and say nothing else. If you have an urge to speak up during the intervention, don’t.  If arguing worked, it would have done so long before now.  Don’t fall into old confrontational patterns during the intervention.

Step Six.  Following the initial intervention, send the alcoholic to an educational treatment program as far away from his “stomping ground” as possible, with a 28-day program as a minimum.  Keep in mind, you are instituting a change.  A life altering change can only be possible if the alcoholic leaves behind all of the factors that contributed to his addiction. That means friends, family, familiar surrounding, job, the neighborhood liquor store and bar.  An alcoholic who has been through intervention needs the support of a residential educational facility such as The Manor House. If this doesn’t happen, the disease will take control again and denial will spring back into place.

THE LETTER

During the initial intervention, emotions can and do run high. Reading your letter prevents you from exploding into spontaneous anger or freezing up at the last moment.  Think of your letter as having three parts. First, begin with a message of love.  The alcoholic needs to hear you speak from your heart. You can use the standard newspaper article “who, what’ where, when, how and why.”  The WHO is the alcoholic, but the WHAT is the part you love and cherish about the alcoholic. Talk about memories; where you were, when it happened; and how you felt.   Tell him why you love him. List the special qualities he possesses, and the things you miss about him.  Be specific and make sure you speak of love first.

The second part of the letter addresses the addiction. Be careful not to impose anger, judgment and blame.  No matter how angry you are at the alcoholic, leave the anger outside the door when you enter for intervention.  When you write from your first hand experience, be specific. A good example is “Three Saturdays ago, you started drinking at noon. First it was beer, but then you switched to Jack Daniels. Your mood changed and it seemed to me everything I did irritate you. You ended up yelling at me. You left in the car.  The children cried when you left. I worried all night long that you may have killed someone or yourself by driving drunk. I was afraid every time the phone rang that it would be the police.”

When you write your description, avoid making judgmental statements.  Use words that are not blaming like - anger, discouraged, helpless, anxious, depressed, worried, hurt, insignificant, insecure, inadequate, ashamed, afraid, frustrated, rejected, reckless, lonely, guilty, apathetic, bewildered, confused, embarrassed, miserable, inferior or numb.

The third and final part of the letter is the closing. Repeat here how much you care and how concerned you are. Then state your support of recovery and ask the alcoholic to accept help. If he says yes, take him immediately to the plane terminal and send him to begin the recovery process. End your letter with a direct question asking the alcoholic if he is willing to accept help.  Make him say yes.

Remember, a rehearsal is necessary before the actual intervention and plan to:

1. Have all team members complete a letter.

2. Listen for a message of love and concern.

3. Use first hand experience when talking about the addiction and refrain from repeating second hand information.

4. Write in the first person, using the word I, rather than we.

5. Remove negative content from the letters.